There have been a lot of times in my life when I am in the midst of a storm, and I have a hard time understanding why the upheaval is not clearly defined for me. I cannot decipher why I am going through the things that I am, and it does not seem fair. I will idealize it as I cannot see the forest for the trees. In 10th grade, my youth pastor shared 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 with me. For me, this Bible verse is continually a light at the end of the tunnel and gives purpose to pain.

Reflecting on the past, I could never conceptualize how my pain could be used for a purpose. I would pray to God and ask him why he would allow me to endure so much pain. I persist in holding onto the perspective that being a good Christian equates to living a painless and straightforward life. This perspective genuinely left my spirit broken and torn. This outlook further caused me to be jealous and envious of the people on social media who always seemed to have it easy. Through this shift in viewpoint with reflection, I learned to trust and not question God.

I am thankful that not only has my perspective shifted, but I have also had the opportunity to comfort others amid their pain. Sometimes, I would talk to someone about what I was experiencing, and they could not give me good advice because they could not relate to what I was going through. A year ago, I asked God for more wisdom, and he reminded me of the story of Job. In the story, Job’s “comforters” insist that he is being punished for his sins. The story ends with Job and God having a conversation that clears the tension but does not resolve the unwarranted suffering. After reading The Story of Job, God told me that wisdom can come when we feel our suffering is needless. He also led me to the Bible verse James 1:5. More importantly, Romans 8:18, “I considered that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us.”

As expressed, pain is not merely to break us or our spirits. Sometimes, undeserving suffering can be redeemed for someone else’s benefit. To close out, the perspective of injustice and selfishness may limit or alter our future actions.

Affirmation:

-I am stronger than I think I am