About a year ago, I started to spend a lot of time with myself and realized how much I enjoyed it! I came across the definition of individuals who are ambiverts, and it brought me so much clarity. An ambivert, in the Cambridge Dictionary, is described as a person who has features of both an introvert (someone who prefers to spend time alone) and an extrovert (someone who likes to be with other people) in their personality. The dictionary also included some descriptives, such as people who are ambiverts, who may also be referenced as social introverts, and individuals who are ambiverts take pleasure in the company of other people but need alone time. This provides an understanding of why I became irritable and moody when I was around others for an extended period. I vividly remember coming home from 2-3 night sleepovers and lashing out at my parents for looking at me the wrong way or hitting my brothers for getting on my nerves.
Although I am still very extroverted, being a social butterfly drains me, especially if I don’t consciously plan out time to be alone. During these times of self-oneness, I can recharge my social battery. In return for my social battery being charged, I am significantly more tolerable to be around. Now, I can observe the behaviors that advise me that it is time to take a social break. One of the most prominent behaviors that signal to me I need a break is when I start complaining about a significant quantity. More recently, the complaint is, “I do not want to talk in this meeting talk.”
To close out, I actively acknowledge that personality characteristics such as being extroverted and introverted are a continuum. However, the process of understanding how that continuum affects and applies to me is only becoming more evident as time goes on. To sum it all up, although the road to self-awareness has been extended, the most prominent benefit of the journey is my ability to blend in and act in whatever way the environment provides for me.
Misbehavin' 